One of the things stopping Christians believing they are in full union with God is the belief that God knows good and evil. Who wants to be in union with such a being? Not me!!
The teaching of going to a Heaven or going to a Hell are the result of this split apart mindset that accuses God of doing evil –of being the one who knows good and evil.
I spent years in depression battling this within myself…calling myself evil beating on myself for my failures. Of course if you think God is evil –that he sends people to burn in an eternal literal fire for their failures –you will inevitably call yourself evil too…for we become like the god we worship…as you know–a false god of hell fire…
The answer has been provided already.
Jesus HAS RECONCILED US TO GOD–GOD HAS already forgiven ALL MANKIND THEIR SINS…
How that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them…2 Cor 5:19
All self blame and self loathing, self hatred and beating oneself up when we fail is practised because we do not see or believe the GOOD NEWS…because most have never heard the good news!
Week after week they hear a message that accuses God of being evil…whether in church or through the media.
We know this will end however because —->>
“Now salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren, who accused them before our God day and night, has been cast down. And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death.” Rev 12:10,11
Internal Hell(the only Hell) ceases when we give thanks to Father for ourself just the way we are–with all our failures and sins–knowing that Jesus took it all into an empty tomb for us and has NOW BECOME OUR VERY INNER LIFE AND NATURE.
When we turn away from seeing sin and evil in ourself and instead see ourselves clean and pure as God does then the wholeness of Jesus is experienced in our emotions and will and everything!!
The Kingdom of God –Salvation…strength..the power of Christ Jesus COME —FROM WITHIN WHERE HE dwells in your heart and floods your whole being with LIGHT swallowing up all darkness and healing the fractured psyche –the split apart inner world you have lived in.